by Dave on May 15, 2009

As first appeared in Coastal Sussex Weekly, April 30, 2009:

If you have spent any time with a person that is between the ages of 2 and 4 you may appreciate this.  While curiosity and questioning life is encouraged in our home, sometimes it’s a little more than we can take.  My husband posted this on about a conversation he had with our daughter very early one morning.  Her questions are first, his responses follow.
Some mornings are REALLY tough. Lisa said the other day that from the time we picked her up from school until she went to bed it was NON-STOP talking. This morning it was the questions……

What’s her name?     Ariel
Why is she singing? Because she’s happy
What’s her last name?  Mermaid
What’s her middle name? (please ?)  The
Is that the sea witch? Yes
What’s her name? (will this coffee ever finish filling the cup?) Ursula
What’s her last name? (Give me a break) SeaWitch
What’s her middle name? (PLEASE??) The
What color is she? (JEEZ – thank goodness the coffee is ready) – She’s green
Why is she green? (I DON’T KNOW) – Because she’s green
What’s his name? (small nails in my skull) – Eric
What’s his last name? (more small nails) – Hero
What’s his middle name? (can I have one more nail please) – Prince
Why is he singing? (so he can spend time not answering questions) – Because he’s happy
Why is he happy? (because he has a sword nearby) – Because he loves Ariel
Why does he love her? (please let it end) – Because he loves her
Are they getting married?(what if I slam my head in a wall) Yes
Why are they getting married? (bracing myself with both hands) Because they love each other
Why do they love each other? (Lisa – please help) Because they do?
Can I love prince Eric? (LISA – HELP!!!!) Yes
Can I love Ariel? (LISA PLEASE HELP) Yes
When I’m a big girl can I marry “B”? Yes
Why will I marry “B”? (so he can answer the questions) Because you will.
Tomorrow? (Please let it end) – No, tomorrow is regular school
Why is it Regular School? (cyanide in my coffee maybe?) Because it is.
What’s the next day? (OH MY GOD I CAN’T TAKE IT) Regular playing and learning at school
What’s the next day? (I CAN’T DO TI ANYMORE) Regular playing at school
Will Miss “L” be there? (AAAHHHHHHH!!!! MY HEAD MY HEAD) Yes
Why will Miss “L” Be there? (Maybe a knife in my eye) Because she’s the teacher?
Why is she the teacher? (yes, a knife in each eye) Because she’s the teacher
Will Miss “M” be there? (I CAN”T DO THIS) Yes
Why will Miss “M” be there? (I CAN’T I CAN’T)- Because she works there.
YEAH….. Lisa is here now……

Lisa can be found on or email

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